Do You Validate?

When you are talking to someone, do you validate their thoughts, feelings or sayings?

Do they validate yours?

I have been noticing lately that people are so quick to say their opinion, how they feel and what they know, that we never stop to validate the other persons feelings, thoughts or sayings, even if they don’t reflect our own.

I say the word ‘validate’ because although the best and most important validation should come from yourself, when a friend or someone says they can see your side and express that it is a rational thought, it shows they respect you, your feelings, sayings and emotions, and most importantly that are listening to you.

I think the art of showing ‘validation’ and respect for a thought or a emotion that might differentiate from our own, is truly a dying act.

From politics, tv shows to just listening to interoffice conversations, I never hear, ” hmm I could see where you got that but this is how I see it.” Or -rather than firing back your side of the story and why it is correct, saying,  “I had no idea you felt that way, I am sorry that is the way you feel, my only intention was to do xyz..”.

I think most people are more prone to see the other side of a conversation when their point of view is acknowledged and validated.

So that is my two sense for the day.. rather than firing back your side and why its correct, take a moment and verbally acknowledge the other side of the conversation.

List to what they say, verbally acknowledge it, and calmly explain your side or offer your feedback.

Not only will you show them respect and possibly resolve something faster.. you might actually learn something!